Relationships

Life is not fair.
This is definetly something I have learned during my life. But it is hard to know, or at least for me, when to stand up for yourself and when you need to back off.
I belive that each and every person are allowed to be as they are, as long as they are not hurting anyone else. I was hurt yesterday by a person close to me. That person said things that are not ok according to my values and also attacked me personally for beliveing what I do. I can understand that person but at the same time I don´t. This person just went way too far....
When being unfairly treated, I do think it is important to stand up for yourself, but you also need to rememeber that life is not always fair and you cannot always get the justice you deserve or you want. This can make you feel extremly crappy, sad, helpless, useless and scared, so how do you handle that situation? I think that a lot of the times you cannot affect the outside factors, so you need to focus on yourself as you is sometimes the only thing you have the power of. I am trying to learn this myself. I spent most of my childhood trying to change my home enviroment and heal my mum because I thought it was unfair that "everybody else" had it better. I wasn´t able to change it, and it made me feel terrible. I SO much wanted things to change and all my focus was on my mum and everything around me. I forgot about myself, maybe the only thing that I could have done something about.
So, what I need to remember: Life is not fair but the only one who will stand up for yourself is you. I think you should always try to do the right thing and that might sometimes mean not getting the justice you feel you deserve. I think it becomes dangerous when you loose your values and maybe slip down to the other persons level who is hurting you, because that is only creating a vicious circle. You need to learn how to feel like a winner without justice, you need to know that how the other person who hurts you sees you, is not defining YOU. You need to learn your limits and when to say stop. You need to take care of yourself first and foremost. You need to trust yourself.