Lion dream

I had a restless night last night...one of my dreams was that Stockholm had been invided with lions that had escaped from the zoo. I watched from my window in my home how several people were bitten to death by the lions, and the blood was just flowing on the streets. The lions stared at me with hostility and roared. I live on the first floor in a house and I knew I wasnt safe. I felt a lot of fear, because I felt the lions were so unpredictable, I felt like if they wanted, they could just jump trough my window and eat me if they wished to. The dream was filled with fear and helplessness.
I also had another dream, a dream about trying and failing again, but I am not going to go into that dream right now...

Baby Deer

I saw two baby deers cross the street on my way to work today. I live in the middle of Stockholm and seeing theese two babies looking all confused with their big brown eyes was a strange sensation. They were all peaceful and in no hurry. They were walking into the park just next to me and they made me smile. Can I see two baby deers on my way to work, then anything can happen :)

NOTE: There is a forrest quite nearby, and I am sure they will be fine and find their way back there, at least that is what I tell myself :/

Pressure

Found out today, that if my project does not deliver on time, all of the employees in my company (about 1000 people) will be without a bonus....talk about pressure!! :/

People in white jackets...

I went to the doctors today where I had a VERY unpleasent examination, but I saw myself from the inside which was kind of cool....but I am happy that theese kind of examinations are the ones you make maybe once in a lifetime.
Tomorrow it is time for the dentist again, not yet to have surgery on the tooth but still...my life seems to be dominated by people in white jackets nowadays... :/

The dentist

back to reality with a crash....or actually with the dentist.
I guess I do have a real phobia when it comes to dentists....when I was a kid (around 8 years old), I hade 6 holes in my teeth, and 4 of them needed rootfilling, and the dentist did it without ANY anestisia!! It hurt so baad, and all she did was tell me to open my mouth some more and lie still.....
My phobia seems to be getting worse day by day also, the tears were just falling down my cheeks and I could hardly breath today at the dentists, but I got trough it! The thing is....in a couple of weeks I need to go there again and have a surgery to remove one of my teeth (don´t know what it is called in english....wisdomtooth? the ones that does not start growing until you are older?)
Aiks! Anybody willing to come and hold my hand....? :/

sun is setting

The sun is setting and my trip is coming to an end....Time has gone by so fast that I dont think that I have even realized that I have actually been in Panama....maybe a couple of more hours in the sun tomorrow, and then off I go, Back home....

Isla Taboga

yep, I ended up leaving the beach I spent New Years at. I got some undercooked fish at the hotel for dinner, which I ended up throwing up the rest of the night, the food wad NOT good there (and yes, I know this might be too much information to some of you, but I still thought you needed to know ;))
Iwanted to come to Tagora Island already yesterday, but the plane was delayed so I did not have a chance to catch the ferry. Luckily my Panamian family called me earlier during the day and wanted to see me beofre I went back home, so I spent the night at their house. They are a great family, and I got a Panamian flag from the dad when we said goodbye and he told me it was for me to remember my Panamian family, they are so sweet!
Taboga island was the perfect second to last day stop. This is actually the first time during my trip that I feel like I even have had time to think and reflect. The day after tomorrow I will be on my way home (NOT looking forward to the 25 hour trip!) and I have had some intense past weeks. There are three women, 10-20 years older than me that I have met during my trip and I think two of them were supposed to meet me and one of them I was supposed to meet (with supposed to meet I mean I have had knowledge or experiences that they could take use of, or the opposite) We have had some really serious and deep discussions that I think we all in different ways have gained from, or will gain from. This was one thing that I did not expect from my trip.
Tomorrow I will head back to Panama City and that will be my last whole day in Panama. Right now I am pretty beat, there has been so much happening all the time and I am actually looking forward to having some routines in my life (at least for a week or so ;)) I miss all of you back home, and I am looking forward to seeing you again :)

The view from my current hotelroom, perfect or not?? ;)